Fullfillment

so full
so tired
so angry
so torn
between her desires
wants to purge
wants to cut
wants to starve
wants to please everyone else
which one will she choose
ate some food
ate some more
ate her heart out
ate every last bite
now she wants to purge
can't purge
can't cut
can't starve
can't please herself when she tries to please them
what will she do?
purges the food
                 to make herself feel light
cuts deeper than ever
                 to dull the pain at night
starves herself
                 from then on
pleases herself and everyone else
                 by hiding what's really going on

xoxo
PDIF