Tuesday, December 18, 2012

My Seat Downtown

Going to the library is always a special treat for me; especially when my favorite chair is open. Tucked back in the far corner on the first floor, the location is perfect for not being disturbed. A small coffee shop lies a few yards behind it, giving easy access to quench any surprise thirsts. I can look out to the busy street and watch the car light blur by on a black canvas. It's almost as if they are painting the town. Occasionally, people mosey by. Usually a couple holding hands, steps in sync; or a family busy wrangling the kids.
During the day traffic is the same if not more intense. Everyone is in a hurry- rushing and speeding by. The trees shine brighter and the street glistens from the heat. More people are usually out- everyone from the pack of teenage giggly girls to the single guy with headphones in. Even though the county trail runs just around the corner, I have never seen a dog prance across my wide window view. The windows were not only wide but tall, stretching all the way to the 12 ft ceilings. Exposed beams allow me a partial view. Despite the annoyance this is by far my favorite place to sit downtown.
A.

Monday, December 17, 2012

Lyric Monday!!! 12/17

I really love this song! It makes me feel like dancing, just because Frank doesn't mean I don't. Enjoy and I suggest listening to it on youtube if you get a chance. Sinatra, as always, is amazing. 
A

 

 

I Won't Dance Lyrics  


by Frank Sinatra

I won't dance, don't ask me
I won't dance, don't ask me
I won't dance, Madame, with you
My heart won't let my feet do things that they should do

You know what?, you're lovely
You know what?, you're so lovely
And, oh, what you do to me
I'm like an ocean wave that's bumped on the shore
I feel so absolutely stumped on the floor

When you dance, you're charming and you're gentle
'specially when you do the Continental
But this feeling isn't purely mental
For, heaven rest us, I am not asbestos

And that's why
I won't dance, why should I?
I won't dance, how could I?
I won't dance, merci beaucoup
I know that music leads the way to romance,
So if I hold you in arms I won't dance

I won't dance, don't ask me,
I won't dance, don't ask me
I won't dance, Madame, with you
My heart won't let me feet do things that they want to do

You know what?, you're lovely,
Ring-a-ding-ding, you're lovely
And, oh, what you do to me
I'm like an ocean wave that's bumped on the shore
I feel so absolutely stumped on the floor

When you dance, you're charming and you're gentle
'specially when you do the Continental
But this feeling isn't purely mental
For, heaven rest us, I am not asbestos

and that's why
I won't dance, I won't dance
I won't dance, merci beaucoup
I know that music leads the way to romance
So if I hold you in arms I won't dance!!

Friday, December 14, 2012

Another Makeup for Lyric Monday (12/9)

This Monday is inspired by my desire to still tell this man how I feel, but waiting for just the right moment. It seems very classless of me to tell him right before the holidays. Holidays are for family. I want him to focus on them, and me telling him how I feel would more than likely distract him from what is really important this time of year. Still I can't help but wonder if waiting is the right thing...
A


What Hurts the Most
By: Rascal Flats     


I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I’m not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I’m ok
But that’s not what gets me

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do

It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doin’ It
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

Not seeing that loving you
That’s what I was trying to do


I am not a smoker?

Whenever people ask if I'm a smoker I always give a prompt no. But the truth is I am. One or two about every three months and only on a day where I just can't seem to handle anything else. This time it was my family. They ignore me so well, that at times I wonder if I'm already dead, and I am only a mere left over portion of a girl who once was I had just needed one person to acknowledge me. One person, removed from the situation,  who could talk to me as I cried silently on the phone. But as I sat on the cold, front step outside the double doors of our classic 70s, Californian home I realized that when it comes down to it, all we have is ourselves. I was the only person I could always depend on to be there at 10pm on a Friday night to get me through till morning. That was the first night I started to truly love myself, flaws and all.